Hey, I have had some of those same feelings. It gets somewhat better on the kid settles into a regular sleep ritual, but there are still some things in your life that have just changed and you have to deal.

You will still find yourself feeling trapped, but the more “interactive” the kid gets the less you are trapped into something boring that you have to endure and the more you are trapped by your own desire not to miss any time with her. Since Sarah is now sleeping pretty consistently 7-7, this means that I never do anything for myself before 7PM, because I don’t to miss the time with her.

On the other hand, it also means there is pretty consistently a window to do something after 7PM. The tricky bit is that it’s only a window for either you or your wife unless you’re going to arrange the logisitics of having a sitter around.

It definitely took some getting used to, since Trish and I used to always do things together in the evening, but now several nights a week one of us will leave to go do something after 7PM. I have my weekly poker game, and often have nights in town with the boys. Trish has piano lessons, and her book club, etc. (I’m actually somewhat pressed here, because after being home all day alone, I really need to get out and see humans!)

Our normal cycle includes the three of us spending all day Saturday together, and Sunday morning together, and then Sarah & I have Daddy-Daughter adventures on Sunday afternoon so Trish can have some alone time at home.

We’ve also started regularly arranging a sitter so that we can get some time with just the two us. This is actually pretty easy since Sarah goes to sleep at 7, so most of the time the sitter is just here to deal with things if she happens to wake up. I can’t stress the importance of getting this time together enough.

So, as you concluded, the thing you need to do is restart your social life, with the understanding that it won’t be the same as it was, but that it doesn’t have to be totally absent either. And make sure that the restarted social life includes both things for you, things for Sonia, and things for the two of you as a couple.

(And it’ll get trickier as O.G. gets older, because when she starts doing tricks and talking you won’t want to get away any time she’s awake!)

I’m glad to see that Mike has made some realizations; that life has to change, but doesn’t have to be all work and no play. As a matter of fact, Olivia seems to love to go out and do things. She was quite the social butterfly over Christmas and handled all of the excitement and stimulation extremely well. I really enjoyed taking her to the Skydome, even when she was with my parents, she was out on the town! I’m so happy to see Mike embracing opportunities to do things with her because I’m sure that she is much happier interacting and doing things than couting the minutes to her bedtime as well. I fear that if there is always the anticipation of the next stage, Mike will miss out on some great opportunities now. He certainly has ensured that I have opporunities to do things for myself such as spa days, time with girlfriends, or even some quality tub time. These little things rejuvinate me and I love the smile that I get from both Daddy and Daughter after returning. Mike is so positive after his alone time with Olivia; I don’t know if he realizes that. He seems excited and proud both at her personality and at his ability to meet her needs, including feeding her. I am proud of him. He is a great daddy; just doesn’t give himself enough credit. Olivia is a lucky little girl…as lucky as I am to have him as my partner.